Monday, March 27, 2006

And you call this dark?

It's been a mopey day. I'm tired of seeing my own reflection in the mirror. My computer's threatening to quit. It's my last week of being officially unemployed so I know I don't have any reason to be disgruntled. I love writing, but novel's are a hard slog. After typing for the past 4 hours, I'm starting to feel I don't really exist and my housemates are probably talking to a hologram. The stuff I have so far is good, if a little disparate. I've got 26k words typed, and another 10-20k more that's handwritten. I'm trying to pace myself so I don't get RSI again. But will it work? I don't know. If I love it and squeeze it hard, will that be enough? The official start date is Monday, 9am. I normally haven't had my first cup of tea by then, but whatever. Hopefully by the time I start, I will have half a novel (the first draft at least). Then after that, I'll have Fridays off to work on the rest. Today I stopped by my friend's shop, where they do drop-in alternative therapy and managed to wrangle a Swedish massage for £12, which is all I have to my name. I haven't had any feeling in one of my hands for the past 3 months, which is a little worrying. At night, both hands go dead. I know it's just a matter of stretching. Something I used to do before I got in with the wrong crowd. Haha. The weekend (after the kebab incident) was relatively disaster-free, although I did drink a lot. Another party Saturday night. Panic attacks about boyfriend, which I kept to myself, then watched him sleep off his hangover all day Sunday. It was pretty thrilling. The highlight of my weekend had to be going to a second party on Saturday with my housemates. Drum n bass and a police line up of MCs in the living room and the wall crawling with 18-year-olds off their heads. Oh yes. Life does not get better. My housemate Steve & I left early, 'round 5am, to retreat to the comfort of our respective beds. While we weren't the oldest people there, we both we'd had enough of the underage scumminess of it all. The above snap is the view out my window, into deepest darkest Hove. I was surprised to notice it had gone dark, despite the extra hour of daylight. It was so warm earlier that I opened my bedroom window, for the first time in months. 'Night.


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